“If thou art pained by any external thing, it is not this that disturbs thee, but thy own judgment about it. And it is in thy power to wipe out this judgment now.”-Marcus Aurelius

One thing has remained steadfast since human inception: The desire to make progress and develop oneself. However, this desire for growth has been hijacked by a society that tells us that creating everlasting change can be quick and easy, which has led to a society in which mediocrity is the standard.

The problem is we’ve been conditioned to look at the titans of industry, world-class athletes and straight-A students and say things like, “Man, it must be nice to be naturally gifted.” What people fail to understand, however, is that most of these top performers weren’t born great but they endured large amounts of pain to become great.

Modern culture constantly perpetuates finding the easiest way to success that requires the least pain. In this article, I’m saying the complete opposite. In fact, I am taking it a step further and saying that voluntarily placing oneself into positions of discomfort is the real key to sustained human progress and growth. Keyword there being sustained.

Voluntary discomfort

Sleeping on the floor rather than the bed, running an ultra-marathon, giving up your favorite food for a period of time, partaking in a physical challenge, waking up 2 hours earlier for 2 weeks in a row. I think you get the point.

The type of discomfort I’m discussing IS NOT the type in which you inflict serious harm on yourself. Instead, the voluntary discomfort I am alluding to forces you to break out of your daily routine, take a massive leap outside of your comfort zone, and pushes you to the edge of your “limitations.” And let me tell you as an ultra-runner, voluntary discomfort will certainly do that! To further illustrate what I’m talking about, read this fable:

Fable of Aesop: A wild boar was sharpening his tusks against a tree when a fox came by and asked him why he was doing this. ‘I don’t see the reason,’ remarked the fox, ‘there are neither hunters nor hounds in sight; in fact, right now I can’t see any threat at all.’ The boar replied, ‘True, but when danger does arise, I shall need to use my tusks. There will be no time to sharpen them then.’

Oh man, this fable explains the profound impact of voluntary discomfort! Here, the boar is surrounded by nothing but peace and tranquility. He has every reason to take it easy and wait until later to sharpen his tusks. There are no threats of any kind in sight! However, the boar knows that battle is inevitable and by sharpening his tusks now, he is training himself to crush any threat that comes his way in the future. The boar prefers to suffer now to be better prepared later.

I take this fable as a great lesson for life: We will certainly face battles in life. Those battles will come in all different magnitudes and we may never know when they will appear. We cannot control that. What we can control is how we prepare for the battles before the first bullet is shot.

“It is precisely in times of immunity from care that the soul should toughen itself beforehand for occasions of greater stress… If you would not have a man flinch when the crisis comes, train him before it comes.”- Seneca

Accepting our lineage

Now yes, there are similar articles online that discuss the importance of voluntary discomfort, but what we so often fail to address is the fact that we are neurologically and biologically designed to avoid pain AT ALL COSTS!

The primitive brain

We are primitive creatures. Our evolution and development can be traced millions of years back. Along with this, the history of brain development can be traced far back as well.

In the nomadic days, danger was imminent. Nomads had to worry about wildlife, weather, and finding shelter that could keep them safe. As a result, the limbic brain was developed, and in particular, the Amygdala part of the limbic brain was developed. This part of the brain was created so that the nomads could sense danger and stay away from it. The amygdala pushed the nomads away from discomfort and propelled them to seek safety at all costs. This is referred to as the innate “negative bias” that the amygdala gives you.

This negative bias, however, was extremely useful back in their day. It’s this negative bias that allowed them to process the fact that there was a threat and to avoid… IMMEDIATELY it. So literally, this negative bias kept them from dying. The only problem is that we arean evolving species we and as we evolve, we do not face the same dangers anymore, but yet the basic functionality of our brain remains the same. Therefore, over time we started to use this negative bias against ourselves. Instead of keep us alive, it now holds us back.

The thinking brain

As man and woman evolved, so did our brains. As a result of the evolving society which experienced technological developments, new challenges, and new societal norms, the Prefrontal Cortex (PFC) developed. This part of the brain is referred to as the “Thinking” brain.

This part of the brain is the part that is responsible for higher thinking and self-development. The PFC has the ability to reason that there is more we can achieve. It’s the part of the brain that allows us to increase our performance, be fantastic problem solvers, and craft new skills.

The PFC is also responsible for willpower and resilience. In times of pain and stress, the PFC is determining how to respond to those sensations. Not only this, but the PFC controls what we pay attention to- our perspective. I think you get the point here. If we can find a way to train the PFC, we can truly develop ourselves.

Battle of the brains

Although humans and our brains have evolved since the days of our nomadic brothers and sisters, the fundamental nature of our brains remains the same.

Have you ever wanted to break a habit so badly and you do well in forming a new one for a day or two but then revert back to your old self? This is a perfect case of the battle between your amygdala and your prefrontal cortex. On one end, your prefrontal cortex allows you to reason that if you drop that old habit and develop a productive new one, you will be a better version of yourself. On the other hand, however, there’s the primitive part of our nature that realizes that in order to become that new person you will have to experience the pain of letting go who you used to be.

At this point, cortisol, our built-in alarm system which provokes stress & anxiety, is triggered. As a result, our primitive brain literally tries to hijack our actions and influences us to quit so that we can run to the security of our old selves as soon as possible and reduce the stress and anxiety we feel.

You’ve been amygdala hijacked…LITERALLY! Yes, there is actually such a term. The hijacking refers to the immediate and overwhelming signal the amygdala sends us in times of discomfort. It urges us to quit as soon as possible so that we can minimize the pain we will feel. Our challenge then is finding a way to go against this negative bias and beat it, or even better, find a way to turn it into a “positive hijack” and find a way to guide the prefrontal cortex to victory.

I mention all of this because change is not as easy as society tells us it is. As you can tell, change requires more than a quick fix. Quick fixes may work temporarily, but our primitive brains will always claim victory over these quick fixes and revert us back to our old selves. In order to change, you must rewire your brain, and that is no simple task! Only true and sustained change results when you realize the internal war in your brain and know that change is hard, yet worth it.

Why voluntary discomfort

So then the question becomes “why voluntarily place myself in positions of discomfort?”

Robert Sapolsky, a neurobiologist at Stanford, says that the main function of the PFC is to encourage the brain to do harder things. The PFC tells us to exercise instead of just sit home. It tells us to get the salad instead of the burger. It tells us to stop putting off homework and start now! But remember, unless we train the PFC, the amygdala is there to insantly revert us back to doing what makes us feel good.

Therefore, if we have identified that the PFC is responsible for self-development and also that its main job is to lead us to do doing harder things when we know it is the right thing to do, why not do the one thing that will train the PFC best: Voluntarily doing harder things! The more challenging things that one does, the more the PFC adapts to doing them and will eventually find ways to combat the amygdala. Each time you engage in voluntary discomfort you are rewiring your brain to work for you instead of against you.

If I was a professional baseball player, and I knew that the function of my bat is to hit the ball, I would practice in the batting cage in order to make sure that I am as strong a batter as possible. I’d want to ensure that I maximize the utility of my bat so that I can be the best player I could be. However, if I never practice, I would be a lousy batter.

Developing ourselves is no different. We know the function of our prefrontal cortex is to push us to do harder things when we know they are the right things to do, such as to stop smoking. Therefore, I want to practice the functionality of the PFC just as a batter practices hitting, and the best way to do this is to voluntarily place oneself in positions of discomfort.

Sustain pain to create change

As we have already addressed, sustained change requires that you not only enter into an internal war (Amygdala vs. PFC), but that you win that war. The last time I checked, internal wars never come out of comfort. Think about it, when was the last time that following your daily routine truly challenged you? Now, what if you have a routine, but then all of a sudden break it or alter it? Now, you feel massive discomfort & this is the start of progress.

The great thing about voluntary discomfort is that you don’t have to live in a state of 24/7 suffering. No way am I saying that! I am not a sadist or masochist by any means. All that I’m saying is that by sporadically doing things you do not want to do, you will become more aware of this internal battle and how to defeat it. Take a 105 ultra-marathon for example. It may last only 24 hours, but the pain and suffering endured will teach you lessons about how to win the internal war that will last a lifetime.

Please, have your pick of suffering

As I’ve mentioned, there’s no one way to experience the growth that I am referring to. There’s a multitude of ways and below are just some that I have either experienced or have studied to be effective:

• Giving up your cozy bed for a night of sleeping on the floor
• Fasting for a period of time
• Performing rigorous exercise or partaking in a physical challenge
• Intentionally experiencing sleep deprivation for a night
• Sitting in solitude for a long duration of time
• Spending time with and serving the less fortunate

As you can tell, there are a plethora of ways to voluntarily experience discomfort. Experiment with it, but once it doesn’t challenge you anymore, try something new.

Benefits of voluntary discomfort

1. Willpower & Resilience: Similar to the Boar sharpening his tusks well before battle, by placing yourself in positions of voluntary discomfort you are sharpening your capacity to deal with hard times before hard times even occur. Let’s be real, life gets tough, but by constantly doing uncomfortable things, you are training your brain to push through these tough times much better than most people can. You’ll start to not only embrace uncomfortable positions but thrive in them.
2. You become limitless: I’ll never forget my first 100-mile ultramarathon. Prior to that race, I ran one 50k, which was a month before and I hadn’t been able to train due to 3 months of military training that precluded me from training. Honestly, I had no business being there, but I wanted to see how much pain I could endure and I wanted to test my “limits.” I finished the race and finished 6th out of 40. My body was screwed, but I completed it and it opened up a whole new realm of possibility to me. I’m not saying go run an ultra, but by doing anything that pushes you to the edge of what you thought were your limits, you discover that your perceived limits were merely figments of your imagination and that you can go far beyond that point. You will find that there’s so much more to you and what you have been experiencing thus far is only the surface.
3. Confidence: This is pretty self-evident. Once you begin to practice voluntary discomfort and start to see that you are achieving things that you assumed were impossible, your confidence will skyrocket! Not only that but once you see that you have become more mentally tough, you will develop a sense of self-worth.
4. Gratitude: It’s true, sometimes you never know how lucky you were to have something until it’s taken away. Through voluntary discomfort, you will begin to be grateful for things you once took for granted.
5. Optimism: You’ll come to realize through all of the prior benefits that voluntary discomfort actually makes you happier. Diamonds, one of the most revered and beautiful things in our world are formed by constant pressure. Yet, once formed, it’s the most beautiful thing in the world. Similarly, by voluntarily doing something that not too many others are willing to do, you will see yourself as a diamond and have a brighter outlook on life as a result.
6. Self-Awareness: I would argue that the absolute best way to find out who you truly are is to partake in things that cause massive amounts of discomfort. You will find what makes you tick, what makes you doubt yourself, how you handle that doubt, how you react when you feel pain, what your self-talk is like, etc. Essentially, placing yourself in uncomfortable situations forces you to perform a live autopsy of yourself, it’s amazing.

Implementation

We’ve covered a lot, but as I mentioned, making true and sustained progress is not easy and anyone who says it is (1) trying to sell you something or (2) straight up lying to you. Actually let me rephrase. Making the leap is easy, staying the course is difficult. Anyone can stay on a diet for a day, but after a few days, things start to get tough due to the amygdala vs. PFC scenario! Below are ways to get past this and sustain the ability to experience voluntary discomfort:

1. Acknowledge that what you are doing is difficult: Don’t say that it’ll be easy. You’ll honestly just set yourself up for failure. Admit that being uncomfortable will be hard. You’re literally going against your brain, and that is not easy! At the same time, however, realize that the person you will become outweighs the temporary discomfort you will feel. When you look at it this way, each moment of suffering is bringing you closer to the person you were created to be.
2. Don’t negotiate your goals: I guarantee you that there will be days that you are tempted to not stay committed to whatever it is that you are doing. You’ll want to maybe run 2 fewer miles that day or not force yourself to engage in conversation. Remember, sustained change comes from engaging in internal war and winning.
3. “Do the opposite rule” rule: This is actually a rule I created for myself. Whenever I decided that I wanted to try something challenging and I gave it much thought, it triggered my internal alarm system and often led to me either putting it off or quitting. So, I decided to try something. The next time I wanted to try something difficult or uncomfortable, I did the exact opposite of what my brain was saying. If my brain was saying “stay in and sleep,” I would AUTOMATICALLY get up and go run with no hesitation. The automaticity of this is essential because if you sit there and ponder it the amygdala will win every single time.
4. If you lose a battle, the war isn’t lost: Let’s be honest, because I sometimes fall victim to this too, there may be a day where we didn’t do what we know we were supposed to. If you are just starting this journey, hiccups are inevitable and its part of the learning curve. Anyone who says that they ALWAYS win the internal battle is lying. They would not be human. However, remember that wars consist of many battles, and in order to win the war, you must maximize the number of battles you win. Therefore, if you mess up one day, that’s fine. Don’t kill yourself over it. The war isn’t over. Just focus on winning the next battle and eventually you’ll win the war.

“Change is hard at first, messy in the middle, and gorgeous at the end.”– Robin Sharma

For those of us that choose to take on voluntary discomfort, knowing that it leads to immeasurable growth and happiness, this quote summarizes the process.

To create the sustained change we have been discussing, we will first feel the immense pain of leaving the person we once were in the past. Then, as we have strengthened our PFC, we will begin to implement new habits, become stronger and show up each day ready for battle. Finally, after winning many battles, we will reach a point where we will look back and recognize that we have grown to the point where we do not recognize the person we used to be. As the stoics put it, this is the point of “Eudaimonia,” or the ultimate happiness, and that too is what all humans want.

Don’t go out and think you are Rambo. Just do little things that make you feel a little pressure and eventually those little things will compound into big things that rewire your brain and ultimately lead you to become the person that you always wanted to become.